On Waking

Sleep wore off me slowly

this morning and only

left grudgingly, clinging

to my eyeballs and leaving

sandy foot prints for

me to wipe away.

I didn’t want to part

with my night time friend

but the thought of

missing the cold greeting

of a late summer day was

a regret I didn’t

want to have. 

But What A Moment

In  a moment of hubris

I asked God for a poem.

She blew across my face

leaving only a whisper.

It was fragrant

like a rose on a 

warm summer day.

It was pungent

like the just peeled

skin of an orange.

It was soft

like the wondering

touch of a baby.

And I cried

the tears of

sad joy

Taking Care of Music

I didn’t care enough for you, my music,

it’s true.

I tried the intimacy dodge

of saying “I love you” reflexively 

as though that would hold off the

accusing eye or stop the 

embarrassing questions 

from being asked.

Of what do you accuse me?

I was hungry for relief

and my soul only wanted

a blanket of sound

over my trembling heart.

And you gave me relief.

I wanted relief from sad thoughts,

So my fingers hurried across waiting keys

filling pages with strong letters

empty of heart and soul.

And you kept me swimming

on the surface of stormy seas

as if floating in a calm.

I wanted shelter from

a grasping world taking

pieces of me 

in every spare moment.

You gave me pleasant

excuses to ignore

the voices giving marching orders

and kept me off the field of battle

one more moment.

I can’t help it if you fill

these emptinesses so willingly.

I didn’t care enough for you, my music,

but I still held you close.

Making Belief

How do you hope for sunshine

when the night keeps coming

sooner in the day?

Will it help to close your eyes

and mumble nursery rhymes?

If you stare long enough at your dreams

will time stop and stare with you?

Better to keep following the rhythm

of laughing crows as they

sweep the sky clear of silence.

Only in their wake will

Autumn keep moving until

the light awakens again.

Perspective

What was the message 

that flew in through the window

crawling over my email and

jumping from noun to verb?

I read it only by implication,

squinting every so often

between the breath of life

and drum beat of passion.

“Out damn spot”, I said

in mock exasperation,

only to go on to tea drinks

higher thoughts and scratching.

I got it, stars, now please get 

back to your own business too.

A Close Call

I had a moment when

the birds were laughing.

I almost walked away

from my chance at humility.

What did they know about

hard ground and hard knocks

of the human kind?

Lucky for me I waited

before turning and

walking on my shadow;

I wanted to move that fast.

They weren’t laughing,

it was the translation in my mind

that screwed up the message.

“Tweet, sweet”, they said

“Tweet, sweet.”

Another Dream

I'm gone sometimes,
And don't know why
Or where.
It's a place that speaks of
Timeless rainfall bringing
Green waves of wistful undulations
And sticks shaking at their trees.
When the moon shines in the window
I know I'm ready to sleep
Or dream at least until
Morning comes bounding
Through the curtain.
At least then I will
Eat lightly salted possibility
And quietly remember
Where I've been.

A Wayward Friend

If I didn’t know better

I’d think the day had a

Mind of its’ own.  

Should I talk to it like

A wayward friend

Who doesn’t have a

Very good map?

It seems to wander

Without much purpose,

And that’s not what the

Experts tell you should happen.

The Next Book

Every moment has it’s surprise

wrapped in the breeze or

covered with time drops.

The ordinary has no story;

you bring your life 

to the meeting of mind and matter

and write together

the next page 

on  the next book 

on your shelf.

So That's It

I finally got the memo,
it took so long that
my Google mail account
almost used up the allotted
7487 mega bytes.
God, it says, is in the Inbox.

Humblewise

It’s keeping me honest,

this blind bumping thing.

I no sooner get wise

than my foolishness

stumbles off my tongue and

splatters on someone else’s toes.

I’m left hoping that

the image of wiping it up

will bring the humble

closer to the surface 

and make the wisdom 

more subject to my soul.

Morning Meditation

It isn’t every day

That you wake up slowly,

Or let the dreaminess

Slip away without clinging.

So when it happens,

Be a good audience;

Enjoy the show while

You can.

Another Lesson

Sorry, Mother, but I had to tell the truth,

Though it was bitter at times and

The words catapulted like they were escaping

A too bright light.  You left and my

Child’s heart had no way to cry;

Father announced that it was time already

To get on with the new life and

After all what would people say when

They discovered that the marriage ended.

Weren’t children of divorce a problem

Waiting to trouble the neighbors?

Sorry, Father, but I had to keep it all in

And hide my broken pieces lest

Someone sweep them into the garbage.

I know I went off and picked them up,

Putting them back together like a

Jackson Pollack painting, one piece out of

Alignment with the other and, while

Well drawn in any small part,

Looked awkward and disjointed when

Viewed from afar.  Just so.

Sorry Sterling that I used you to

Hide my nakedness behind your

Idealism and peeked out every so often

Like a performer gauging the audience

Before the play begins, and there

You were trying so hard just to be

On stage and saying your lines like

You meant every word.  And you did.

But my wanting to be out got in the way.

Sorry my dear Soul, for taking so long

To know that all my fears would

Get me was loneliness and a

Canyon wide gulf between my

Dream of love and the world of

Dreams I was living.  

Thank you, God for this time of

Learning about myself and for

Keeping in touch all the while I

Had my phone on automatic

Forwarding to the “out” file.  

I sure left a lot to do, and not do.

The Cove

Take me to your secret cove

Where waves caress the rocks

And fishes swim the night fantastic.

I want to know how you make

Light dance and sand swirl,

I want to splash away my cares and

Hug your barnacles.  There on the

Edge of eternity I will

Profess my love and die sweetly

To awake in another dream.

A Wonderful Day

It is a wonderful day,

And the colors of my soul waving

In the winds of wonder are

Flapping out their message

With hands that reach deep

Into the earth and pull my

Cherished ones closer to my heart. 

I could fly if I wanted, but

Today I’m going to stand at the 

Edge of life, arms outstretched and

Gathering in the world to

God’s love.